I always say my voice is permanently tuned to Billy Joel from singing along to his songs during my own adolescence. The songs "Movin' Out" and "Vienna Waits for You" literally informed my decision to leave home and go as far away as possible. I still don't need a house out in Hackensack, I like to say.
We are at that age now, where we lose our friends, and I try to say I'm getting used to it, but even so, what I really mean is I'm getting used to feeling that pain of loss. It's part of life now, and I guess that is alright. It can't be any other way.
Thanks for sharing. It's comforting to know of others on the journey of life who are having similar experiences. For some reason knowing we are not alone in our hopes and dreams, and our losses, is a comfort. We can endure hard things and keep up the good fight, together! The people united will never be defeated!
Mary, I am so sorry for your loss. My closest friend had cancer several years ago, and her battle brought us even closer than we had been ever since middle school. She shared that journey with me and I am so grateful that she now is cancer-free after her 5-year checkup. We text each other every day and we always will. I can empathize with you, because I know that the friends we had in our youth are irreplaceable. I hope that over time, your memories of your friend will bring a smile to your face, and joy to your grieving heart.
I can only imagine how you must feel. My best friend since we were eleven years old got cancer two years ago, just before lockdown. She is now on targeted chemotherapy, which means taking a big pill daily for the rest of her life. When we went into severe lockdown here in Italy - she lives in Ireland where we grew up - I was convinced I'd never see her again. But, lo and behold, she came to visit me in November. A surprise visit. As you say, we don't ever have to explain ourselves to one another, she knew how worried I was and it was wonderful to see her again.
No "I'm sorry" will fill that wound...but I am so sorry for your loss. Wounds like that are like a deep puncture; they have to be left open at the surface, so the healing can come from the inside.
In retrospect, as an ardent fan of Mr. Joel, as I scan through his incredible catalog, I can't help but see a pattern of him seeing the slow death of the American Dream as it was known prior to the cold war, and coping with the "starting over" that came to be during the peak of his writing... The nostalgic looks back ("Keeping the Faith"), the self destructive grief, (" Captain Jack"), the confrontation of his own mortality (The Dirge, "Down Easter Alexa"). What an important body of work, and such a salve on us "Cold War Kids", who faced the dualling questions, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" Backed by, "Don't make any long term plans, Russia's gonna nuke us any day!"
I have always loved how music acts as a pin in the map of our lives. I hope you have some special "pins" in your personal map, marking those special times with your childhood friend. These are the landmarks that help us when the night is dark, and they guide us on our way. Maybe an evening will come when "In the Middle of the Night" will have a more special meaning for you. Be as well as you can...
Always moving. In all ways. Moving. I am so sad. Sorry to search for words. There are none. No worthy words. But through loss I know. I am grateful for friends who feel with me. I believe you must be too as we are with you.
Beautiful, bittersweet story. Sorry for the loss of your dear friend. My longest, closest and most wonderful friend died last spring. I am still processing the void.
Thank you for sharing this personal information. My sympathies for your loss. I have an aunt who has been friends with another woman since kindergarten, about 75 years ago. I always found that remarkable. Two of my three siblings, my mother, and that aunt are the only people who knew me well from my childhood to my mid-thirties that remain in my life. I just lost another aunt in November who fit that category. I feel as though I have missed something important in life by not having any friends that have remained in contact. My memory is poor. It would be nice to have someone who does remember me to help me find those lost memories.
So sorry to hear about your friend. I had a similar thing happen to me with my best friend. We met in Grade 7 and instantly became inseparable. She was my maid of honour at my wedding and I at her wedding a few years later. I moved about 3 hours drive away, had two children and we grew apart. She and her husband never had children but not for lack of trying. We connected again when my kids were older so had more time to actually meet. She talked about going to England with her cousin in 2007 but her cousin was unable to go so I invited myself! We had the best trip and it was so easy to just slip into that place we had been so many years ago. The next year we went away again on a walking tour to the Isle of Wight plus side trips to Bath and the walkway that the Beatles famously crossed. (We were both crazy Beatles' fans!) We couldn't go the next year because she developed breast cancer (again) and was doing vigorous chemo treatments. I invited her to the Jersey Boys' Show with me and we had a blast! So many memories with those tunes. In July 2010, she got really sick and gave up on Aug 1, 2010. I miss her to this day and often think about my dear friend. I definitely understand your grief from the same place with my best friend.
Doris Waite, this truly was beautiful friendship . Sorry for your loss. The best part was how you just went took the trip and we’re able to spend a dream of a time that will go on in your heart I’m sure she felt the love so deeply.
I always say my voice is permanently tuned to Billy Joel from singing along to his songs during my own adolescence. The songs "Movin' Out" and "Vienna Waits for You" literally informed my decision to leave home and go as far away as possible. I still don't need a house out in Hackensack, I like to say.
We are at that age now, where we lose our friends, and I try to say I'm getting used to it, but even so, what I really mean is I'm getting used to feeling that pain of loss. It's part of life now, and I guess that is alright. It can't be any other way.
Thanks for sharing. It's comforting to know of others on the journey of life who are having similar experiences. For some reason knowing we are not alone in our hopes and dreams, and our losses, is a comfort. We can endure hard things and keep up the good fight, together! The people united will never be defeated!
I’m so sorry for your loss. Losing a lifelong friend is so hard. 💔
Condolences on the loss of your dear friend. Our memories are our lifeline.
Mary, I am so sorry for your loss. My closest friend had cancer several years ago, and her battle brought us even closer than we had been ever since middle school. She shared that journey with me and I am so grateful that she now is cancer-free after her 5-year checkup. We text each other every day and we always will. I can empathize with you, because I know that the friends we had in our youth are irreplaceable. I hope that over time, your memories of your friend will bring a smile to your face, and joy to your grieving heart.
I can only imagine how you must feel. My best friend since we were eleven years old got cancer two years ago, just before lockdown. She is now on targeted chemotherapy, which means taking a big pill daily for the rest of her life. When we went into severe lockdown here in Italy - she lives in Ireland where we grew up - I was convinced I'd never see her again. But, lo and behold, she came to visit me in November. A surprise visit. As you say, we don't ever have to explain ourselves to one another, she knew how worried I was and it was wonderful to see her again.
No "I'm sorry" will fill that wound...but I am so sorry for your loss. Wounds like that are like a deep puncture; they have to be left open at the surface, so the healing can come from the inside.
In retrospect, as an ardent fan of Mr. Joel, as I scan through his incredible catalog, I can't help but see a pattern of him seeing the slow death of the American Dream as it was known prior to the cold war, and coping with the "starting over" that came to be during the peak of his writing... The nostalgic looks back ("Keeping the Faith"), the self destructive grief, (" Captain Jack"), the confrontation of his own mortality (The Dirge, "Down Easter Alexa"). What an important body of work, and such a salve on us "Cold War Kids", who faced the dualling questions, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" Backed by, "Don't make any long term plans, Russia's gonna nuke us any day!"
I have always loved how music acts as a pin in the map of our lives. I hope you have some special "pins" in your personal map, marking those special times with your childhood friend. These are the landmarks that help us when the night is dark, and they guide us on our way. Maybe an evening will come when "In the Middle of the Night" will have a more special meaning for you. Be as well as you can...
Always moving. In all ways. Moving. I am so sad. Sorry to search for words. There are none. No worthy words. But through loss I know. I am grateful for friends who feel with me. I believe you must be too as we are with you.
Friends like that are irreplaceable. So sorry to read of this loss.
Beautiful, bittersweet story. Sorry for the loss of your dear friend. My longest, closest and most wonderful friend died last spring. I am still processing the void.
I'm sorry for your loss. I think Summer Highland Falls is one of the best Joel songs. Peace be with you, Mary!
♥️ Your loss speaks to each of us. I think of you saying, “At least there is art.” At once the pain you feel is with us.
Beautiful, amazing ❤️💔
Sincere condolences.
I’m 72, in the past year one college friend died of cancer, another friend fighting Stage 4 Cancer now.
The answer to this sadness is kindness and respect to family, friends, and strangers.
Thank you for sharing this personal information. My sympathies for your loss. I have an aunt who has been friends with another woman since kindergarten, about 75 years ago. I always found that remarkable. Two of my three siblings, my mother, and that aunt are the only people who knew me well from my childhood to my mid-thirties that remain in my life. I just lost another aunt in November who fit that category. I feel as though I have missed something important in life by not having any friends that have remained in contact. My memory is poor. It would be nice to have someone who does remember me to help me find those lost memories.
So sorry to hear about your friend. I had a similar thing happen to me with my best friend. We met in Grade 7 and instantly became inseparable. She was my maid of honour at my wedding and I at her wedding a few years later. I moved about 3 hours drive away, had two children and we grew apart. She and her husband never had children but not for lack of trying. We connected again when my kids were older so had more time to actually meet. She talked about going to England with her cousin in 2007 but her cousin was unable to go so I invited myself! We had the best trip and it was so easy to just slip into that place we had been so many years ago. The next year we went away again on a walking tour to the Isle of Wight plus side trips to Bath and the walkway that the Beatles famously crossed. (We were both crazy Beatles' fans!) We couldn't go the next year because she developed breast cancer (again) and was doing vigorous chemo treatments. I invited her to the Jersey Boys' Show with me and we had a blast! So many memories with those tunes. In July 2010, she got really sick and gave up on Aug 1, 2010. I miss her to this day and often think about my dear friend. I definitely understand your grief from the same place with my best friend.
Doris Waite, this truly was beautiful friendship . Sorry for your loss. The best part was how you just went took the trip and we’re able to spend a dream of a time that will go on in your heart I’m sure she felt the love so deeply.